A different kind of Christmas Eve!

Besides the chilly weather it didn’t feel like Christmas Eve here in Patna. I missed the Christmas music, brightly decorates houses and the mad rush of last minute shoppers.

However I did celebrate with my very first dinner invitation! Pratimaji, my go to for everything in town – invited us over for a delicious feast. Just one step in and I knew it was a home. Her uncle and aunt were gracious hosts – who went out of their way to make us feel welcome. The highlight was Pratimaji’s little brother – Om – who had captured everyone’s attention. I loved the way her uncle always referred to his wife as “Tumhari Auntie”…”Your Auntie”. There are several such constant little reminders about how integrated families here truly are. I continue to be amazed with Indian hospitality and the warmth with which guests (planned or unplanned) are welcomed. The conversation, the delicious food and being surrounded by a family was so reminiscent of past holidays. Although, nothing could ever replace Katie’s hilarious gift tags and thoughtful quirky gifts, I felt that special Christmas Eve joy all around miles away from home. 

Cold day @ work!

                      

Winter has arrived in Patna. Everyone at work is questioning if I am really from Chicago. I am clearly the one that is always the coldest! And yes, it is cold all the time every where. Little bonfires have sprung up in every corner...makes for great bonding time with the housemates and neighbors. 

Gratitude

I was immensely relieved to finally get to my seat for the flight from Patna to Bombay. Getting a boarding pass, passing through security and actually making it on a plane requires enormous will and patience here. An old joyful lady plopped herself next to me. I reached over and helped her fasten her seat belt to prep for takeoff. Instantly, she grabbed my hands into hers and kissed them. With a grand smile she made sure I knew that she appreciated the help. It made me wonder why some people are able to express gratitude so easily. Despite the language barrier she communicated her gratitude instantaneously. On my flight back to Patna, feeling re energized by the amazing week with family and friends both new and old – I began to think about all the things I was grateful for:
My aunt pampering me with my favorite foods all at once! Just having a home cooked meal was a delight. Instead she had a buffet of options and I didn’t hold back on any! It is so heartwarming to know that someone went out of their way to plan for your arrival.

       Spending time with my ninety-something year old grandpa. I recognize way too often how precious this time with him is – to have the opportunity to watch a cricket match, chit chat on the sofa and stare out the window with him, is worth the entire trek. I hope I can communicate just how precious he is to me through my actions throughout this year.

  

         I also loved trying to befriend my newest niece. Her big expressive eyes communicated her curiosity and mischievous nature. The joy she brings to her parents and grandma made me appreciate just what a difference a little girl that doesn’t even speak can make.


I was immensely grateful for the time my aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters and sister in law made without me even asking. They took me shopping, out to a rural carnival(!), fulfilled random Shiv Sagar, VadaPav and ThumsUp requests and even waited outside an unanswered door for 20 minutes! The greatest and most precious gift of all is time. I am blessed to have a family that is so gracious with it. I even got a little goody bag of treats to bring back with me!

Sharing laughs and food with the fellows & AF team was incredibly reenergizing. It was fun to show off Mumbai and explore it with such close friends. Looking in, no one would have guessed that this was the first time we had really spent time with the AF India staff. It was a much needed break that confirmed how incredibly powerful a support system can be.

I was grateful for the sense of freedom, to hop in a rickshaw or take a bus. To not have to worry or ask for directions. It was lovely to feel independent for a few days. Yet at the same time, I felt so fortunate to be taken care by family and friends. Little thoughtful acts like my brother carrying my suitcase up two flights of stairs, my uncle and brother’s insistence on giving me rides or the fellows who are always willing to listen and advise are great reminders of how blessed I am.

Although I may not have expressed my gratitude as instantly and as easily as the wise grandma, all of these moments helped me create a sense of calmness within as I landed in Patna. The city has turned bitter cold but Surajji’s (the guesthouse’s entertaining cook) smile was my warm welcome back. 

To lead with Love or Fear?

I’ve been thinking about this question since Jacqueline posed it to the fellows during our Good Society Retreat. My gut told me then that one should lead with love because fear just isn’t sustainable.

It has been abundantly clear through interactions with various practitioners, entrepreneurs and thought leaders over the past few months - how no one approach, no one technique or no one person will be the silver bullet to the issues we face. This in my mind makes it absolutely critical to encourage multiple views and honest feedback to enable real solutions.

New inventions, new information or new uprisings can abruptly turn the tables.  Those leading with fear can suddenly find themselves being led. Fear survives on power that’s acquired through punishment, through threats of pain and creating a sense of insecurity or a loss of control. With constant fear, the freedom individuals have to think, share, discuss, dream, experiment and explore begins to slowly diminish. If people are afraid, they begin to prioritize their own well being above all else, information is held back in fear of repercussions and individual creativity eventually gets stifled.

Love on the other hand patiently allows leaders to listen with an open mind to gain a real understanding. It creates trust that allows individuals to learn from each other as they willingly share the mistakes that have been made. Love permits us to take chances, to support and encourage others to develop their own path no matter how unchartered it may be. It is these unchartered paths full of obstacles that lead to real breakthroughs.

What is most striking though is that leadership through love creates something that is sustainable beyond one person or one lifetime. The teachings of Gandhi, MLK or Mandela are a testament. The inspiration they set forth transcends nationality, gender, race, culture and generations. Leading with love, enables the creation of a shared vision that can not only survive but even flourish in the leaders’ absence. Something fear can’t create despite his physical presence.

For us to flourish as a whole, we must strive to lead with love. 

When there's a will there's a way!

I am struggling to adjust to my new “home”. There are minor but daily challenges associated with being a woman in this environment. Even the six years in the trucking industry didn’t prepare me adequately for this transition! I am one of three women in the office, I can’t walk home alone after dark (that’s usually around 5PM), and in fact I don’t really do much on my own during the day. It isn’t common for females to work. The land lords in the area don’t lease to single females without solid local references because it seems odd that a girl would be living in a city by herself for her “job”. The ladies time (yes, of course there are separate times for gents &ladies) at the gym starts at 10:00 AM and ends at 5:00PM while the men are at work.

Just as I was starting to question how successful I can truly be in this environment, I met a young woman who has proven that it not only possible to be successful but rather excel beyond expectations. She’s a bony 25 year old gal who is working in the remotest parts of Bihar. She has conceivably the toughest job in the organization, managing collections for the region.  She can’t travel anywhere alone, day or night because it isn’t safe. Yet, she is managing over twenty men spread across several villages. In three short months, she has developed relationships that allow her to get things done, often over the phone. She doesn’t resort to yelling or screaming – instead she encourages her team by starting small competitions or buying presents for their girlfriends. I asked her what motivated her to keep trying despite the obvious obstacles. Without any hesitation she answered, “You have to have passion to succeed here. You have to build relationships because nothing else will work in the villages.”

Despite the never ending hindrances, challenging living arrangements and at best - limited freedom - (while she sleeps), she manages to maintain a positive and cheerful attitude throughout my three days with her. My transition to Patna suddenly seems so minor in comparison. 

Inspiration in the constraints

The foul fishy smell is overwhelming enough to divert my attention away from the deafening sounds of the blaring horns on the main street. I struggle to keep up with my guide down the narrow path while attempting to avoid the sight of meat being butchered in the open. For a vegetarian, the stench of blood and hanging carcasses is repulsive but I'm trying not to look disturbed or bothered by my surroundings. Finally, the path opens into what looks like a junk yard at the first glance. I’m told this is the R&D center for the company. Nonchalantly my guide mentions, “It isn't fancy because we are implementing solutions in rural Bihar." This is where new processes, equipment and designs are developed to bring electricity to areas that have never had a steady source of power.  The staff despite their limited educational background is breaking new ground. The constrained resources are their inspiration.

This team stands out because it dares to look past what meets the eye. In an area where electricity is a rare phenomenon, the company is experimenting with tablet PCs, mobile applications and remote monitoring systems to address their operational challenges. They are training locals to not only operate the plant equipment but  use the latest technology with an interface designed specifically for them. These developments are still in an initial phase but each demands a creative imagination.

An imagination that dares to dream big; dares to believe in individual potential regardless of education or past experience;  dares to dig deep to see what lies below the surface; dares to patiently innovate new solutions for challenges that have existed for decades.  

Relative Satisfaction

I moved from a spacious and now seemingly luxurious one bedroom in Indiana to a shoe box in New York city.  But it wasn’t until I visited the Padrona region in Bihar that I found a new appreciation for the Patna guest house I’m now living in. The initial shock of the dirty bathroom I share with men wore off only when I heard from another fellow who had no running water. Suddenly, I was thankful for my cold bucket baths despite the swarming mosquitoes. The darkness in rural Bihar gave me an appreciation for the fluctuating voltage in the city that ruined my charger day 1. Making a twelve hour train, bus and rickshaw journey made me realize the luxury of sitting in a car for six.

Satisfaction is so relative.

Power to Empower

Bright futures and smiles
Photo Credit: Husk Image Library

The transition from New York to Patna

It has been a little more extreme than I anticipated.  To help me stay positive throughout the nine months I decided to start a list of the things I like about Patna. Things I am experiencing that I don’t want to forget. I plan to update the list throughout my time here….

·         The hot rotis and morning Chai are absolutely divine

·         Surprisingly, despite Bihar’s reputation there is a very limited divide between the help staff and management. Perhaps it is an indication of just the people I work with. The drivers, cooks and staff are given the same dignity, the same type of ownership as the managers. They are invited to the hotel celebrations, they sit with the entire group and are respected as part of the team from the very top. This is rare in India and an incredible testament to the values of this organization.

·         There is Hindi music blaring at odd moments of the day and night. Its affirmation that I am in India!

My daily view

View from the office window

Ying and Yang

Patna. The overwhelming stench of the garbage along the dirty roads is hard to ignore. I have to conscientiously dodge the red spit stains, cow dung and stray dogs on my walk to the office. The cycle rickshaws, barely lit roads with small temples give you the impression of a village decades ago. Yet the same city is home to a revolving restaurant, malls and several innovative organizations all working towards change.

This development was recently highlighted, when my housemates and I ventured to a pristine mall on the other side of city to experience the best restaurant Patna offers. Puneetji, without any hesitation plopped next to the rickshaw driver as the rest of us piled into the back. I couldn't contain my smile at the sight of something familiar. A mall complete with Biba, Café Coffee Day, Adidas and Domino's outlets. Yet, the disparity between life inside and outside the shiny new building is impossible to ignore.

Last night I sat, the only girl with a group of 12 other male co-workers, listening to Jay-Z blaring on one set of speakers competing with an old Hindi classic on the other. It struck me - countless such unexpected and unchartered moments wait for me and for Patna. 

Changing the status quo

Walking up the dusty cement stairs under construction to get to the shared conference table where I work is no longer unusual. Ironically, the deafening sound of the diesel generator signifies the start of the work day at the clean energy company. Unlike at Acumen, there are no required Friday reflections or fellows around to discuss and capture what I have learnt this week. Yet, today I felt compelled to pause.

As glamorous, sexy and exciting as social entrepreneurship sounds in a business school classroom – the reality is far from it.  The entrepreneur must have the patience to repeat himself and drive the very basics from the top down. He must have the flexibility and willingness to explain how to hide a row in excel, how to integrate the MIS system into every department all while being cognizant of paying for diesel for the generator downstairs, to buy an additional hour of electricity for the ongoing meeting. It's not glamorous, definitely not sexy and going through mundane yet critical operational details is far from exciting. 

Yet, it is that flexibility and that willingness that actually changes the status quo. Change ...despite the odds, the naysayers and the never ending challenges. 

Plant Visit #1

Training operators, mechanics and engineers

The guys who brighten rural Bihar

Sinking in rice husk!

Drastic Realities

Crossing the Ganga on the way to Behatti was a serene experience. There is something powerful about witnessing a river you’ve heard worshipped for thirty years. The sheer breadth of the river is striking and it looked even so serene early in the morning. The superstitious side kicks in and I think I’m off to a good start.

I visited three Husk plants and toured a market place all glittering with Husk powered white lights. An incredible reminder of the real difference this organization is making in the lives of these villagers. Just pulling out my camera in the marketplace resulted in an instant crowd around me…I need to invest in a more discrete camera to truly capture the faces amidst the bright lights.

Most of my day though was spent trying to reconcile the differences between my reality and the reality I was observing. This highlighted even more at the Dhaba where we stopped along the highway around Ten. Bihar has “line hotels” – fast food joints at best where truckers stop to eat. They are open 24-7, open aired and serve the basics. While I shivered in my fleece waiting for our food, I noticed a little boy with ear muffs running around in shorts serving water to the guests. Soon, he hopped into the bed behind me, covering himself with a blanket from head to toe.  Having recently watched, I am Kalam, I couldn’t help but think about the realities of the countless young boys that won’t have the happy ending Kalam did in the movie.

My thoughts get interrupted as 5 guys carrying giant guns enter the Dhaba. Their faces are covered and they are hovering around like they own the place. They enter the kitchen, the back room, without any concern for the patrons. No one at my table even flinches. Suddenly it is apparent that I’m the only girl in the entire Dhaba. I am hesitant to even bite, because I’m envisioning a typical Hindi movie scene. Bihar has a reputation for violence and I’m going to experience it on Day 2. Reluctantly, I whisper to a fellow traveler, making sure he notices the guns. 

He dismissively asks, “Where?”   

God, I should have taken the Security Briefing seriously. 

“All around” I murmur. 

How could you not notice five guys hovering with guns? 

Finally he says, “Oh, they are cops….see their camouflage?”  

Despite so much talk about mental models and steering away from stereotypes – it took about 20 seconds to divert to the worst.

I’m left questioning how (not if) I can play a part in reducing the differences between the realities I am witnessing.

I’m definitely in Bihar, it wasn’t a dream!

I hop on Satishji’s bike and head to the office. Unfinished stairs without a railing, wireless internet that doesn't work and a bustling conference room table that’s being used as an office by 5 people  – all signs that I am at a start up. The 20 minute chat with the CEO is enough evidence to see why he’s been able to create this enterprise. He is direct, concise and encouraging in the time I spend with him. He directs “Take the next step, even if it isn't the best step.” Thanks to Satishji I get access to internet and meet the rest of the team.

Later in the evening, my tolerance for noise, need for personal space and/or security gets put to the test.  I hop on Satishji’s bike again to go to the bank, still haven’t figured out the foot rest bit, so my right leg is dangling in mid-air. I quickly realize why the rests are a necessity in the first place; I’m surrounded by jeeps, rickshaws, trucks, people and two wheelers all honking for attention at once. I try to keep my foot as close to the bike as possible while avoiding the turning wheel; Haunting tales of people’s duppatas and pants getting stuck flash in my mind.  Drivers swerve to change directions at their heart’s whim and I feel like I should expect whiplash tomorrow.  I’ve been in Indian traffic before but never like this.

A gal from the office was kind enough to take me on an apartment hunting trip. She said we needed to get a rickshaw. I didn’t realize were pursuing a cycle rickshaw. They are all around Patna. I felt like a giant and wished I could make myself instantly lighter. Fortunately, we walked home.  

I did manage to get a phone so I’m finally connected. Feeling a bit more settled now.  

Arrival in Bihar!

I landed in Delhi yesterday in sheer awe of the shinny, sparkley airport. It was no different than the Amsterdam airport even the posted signs seemed to be the same. Despite the 14 hour flight, it wasn't until I saw the Dillichat counter at the airport that it truly hit me that I was in India.

3 hours later I was on the flight to Patna. A stark difference from the award winning airport I had experienced earlier. Patna has 2 baggage belts so my giant suitcase was pretty easy to spot. When I stepped outside to see the swarms of mosquitoes & flies hovering around the lights - I knew I was really here. This is going to be India unlike anything I've experienced before. As I stood outside hoping my ride hadn't forgotten about me, avoiding the shoves of the crowd of taxi drivers -  I reminded myself how I had knowingly signed up for ambiguity.

A pleasant evening at Satishji's followed. I met my two housemates and Satishji's brothers family. His nephews set up the bright pink mosquito net around my bed after dinner. It is such little touches of hospitality that make me feel welcome. The bed is hard, the bucket bath is cold but the IU sweats I brought with me give me a sense of comfort. Day 1 @ the office awaits.

Creating a space for all voices

This past week was filled with introspective activities that gave me insight into myself - be it my natural tendencies, my mental blocks or my weaknesses. More importantly,  I recognize the enormous value in paying attention to the variety of voices around as a result of this week. At IDEO, we learnt that the most interesting insights come from the most extreme cases. Yet oddly enough, the softer or marginalized voices got drowned out during the most chaotic and time constrained scenarios. It wasn't until we deliberately paused and reflected on the various activities that I realized how detached I felt to an outcome when I hadn't been heard throughout a process. Not being heard once, shaped my thinking and my actions for all the activities that followed. Perhaps, this is why the lessons in empathy are so critical to developing solutions. And also why choice became an important concern last week.

For the first time, I also feel an enormous sense of responsibility to push myself outside my own comfort zone, certainly for personal growth but more so on the behalf of others.  Others in similar situations, constrained by their own limitations were looking to me to break my own mental blocks. I recognize the importance of adapting my style based on circumstances. Some circumstances demand silence as a leader while others demand taking the risk when you are just as unsure as everyone else. The key is to not get boxed into one pattern, but instead to remain nimble, to remain aware, to listen, to involve others and to act despite the uncertainty. Leadership is a balancing act between being a participant and an observer, each role just as critical to accomplishing the goal. 

Lack of Choice

Tuesday Oct 11: We each got a 2-ride metro card and $5 to go experience available social services in NYC. No phone, no maps, no credit cards. Here's a reflection from my day.

Every entrance reminded me that I was entering a place for “Homeless” people. It was a consistent message communicated through the metal detectors that greeted me at the entrance, the x-ray machine that no longer worked, the police frisking each entering resident and through the shelter rules that dictated “no alcohol, no sex, no perfume, no electronics…” on the entrance walls. Despite the lack of any useful information, related to available services, hours, procedures or instructions regarding where to simply wait for assistance, the word “Homeless” reappeared consistently throughout the day.

Once inside - I waited. Ironically, I waited for the lady to finish her lunch so she could talk to me about the screening procedures for food stamps. I waited, after walking several blocks, to be told I would have to go to an assessment center before being allowed into the shelter I finally found. I waited, to get directions to the closest hospital since the one I was at had been closed. I waited in lines, I waited to be called, I waited to be approached, I waited to be told what to do and I waited to simply be noticed. As I waited, I realized how I had no other choice.

It certainly wasn’t all despair or hopelessness; much to my surprise I shared numerous smiles. I saw fashion conscientious 20 something’s walking out of the shelter that could’ve easily been mistaken for residents at a women’s dorm. They possessed enormous strength and courage that I found myself envying. The elderly women told me to have a blessed day as they made their way to the café down the street that serves free food. They displayed such faith and purposeful courtesy as they acknowledged my presence. As I walked around the strikingly isolated and neglected streets of Brooklyn, groups of men talked and flirted with me, unaffected by what I interpreted as harsh surroundings. Perhaps, that explains why the chairs and water cooler in a waiting lobby were such a welcome change. I witnessed hope, fear, laughter, desperation, strength and acceptance.

They may need help but they are still adults. They want information but don’t want to be told what to do. They need help to access services not a list of roadblocks as they navigate through this endless maze. Their identity is larger than their current homeless, alone and hungry status. I wish they weren't asked to believe otherwise through every interaction.

I came back home, the others are still trying to find a way out. I recognize the power of having a choice.